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Talk:Harriet/@comment-3072269-20120817213014
Harriet: I wrote a song! It's called "Horoscopes" Here are the lyrics! AQUARIUS! There's travel in you future when your tounge, freezes to the back of a speeding bus! Fill that void in your pathetic life by playing Whack-A-Mole seventeen hours a day! PISCES! Try to avoid any Virgo's or Leo's. With the abola virus! You are the true lord of the dance, no matter what those idiots at work say! ARIES! That look on your face will be priceless when you find that fourty pound watermelon in your colon! Trade toothbrushes with an albino dwarf and give a hickey to Meryl Streep! TAURUS! You will never find to happiness! Whatcha gonna do CRY about it? The stars predict tomorrow you'll wake up , do a bunch of stuff, and then go back to sleep! Chorus That's your horoscope for today! (Ay , yay yay yay yay yay) That's your horoscope for today! *small istrumental* (repeat of those two lines) ---- GEMINI! Your birthday party will be ruined once again by your explosive flatulence! Your love life will run into trouble when your finacee hurls a javelin through your chest! CANCER! The position of Jupiter says you should spend the rest of the week face down in the mud! Try not to shove a roll of ductape up your nose while taking your driver's test! LEO! Now is not a good time to photocopy your butt and staple it to your boss's face (OH NO!) Eat a bucket of Tuna flavored pudding and wash it down with a gallon of strawberry Quick! VIRGO! All Virgo's are extremley friendly and intelligent, EXCEPT FOR YOU! Expect a big suprise today, when you wind with your head impaled upon a stick! (Chorus repeat) Now you may find it inconceivable or at the very least a bit unlikely that a relative postion of the planets and the stars have a special deep signifigance of meaning that exclusivley applies to only you but let me give you my assurance that these forecasts and predictions are all real and solid scientific documented evidence so you would have to be some kind of moron not to realize that every single one of them is absoulutely true, WHERE WAS I? LIBRA! A big promotion is just around the corner! FOR SOMEONE MUCH MORE TALENTED THAN YOU! Laughter is the very best medicine, remember that when your appendix bursts next week! SCORPIO! Get ready for an unexpected trip, WHEN YOU FALL SCREAMING FROM AN OPEN WINDOW! Work a little bit harder on improving your low self esteem, you stupid freak. SAGITTARIUS! All your friends are laughing behind your back! KILL THEM. Take down all those naked pictures of Ernest Borgnine you've got hanging in your den! CAPRICORN! All the stars say your an exciting and wonderful person, but you know they're lying. If I were you I'd lock my doors and windows and NEVER NEVER NEVER leave my house again! (Chorus repeat) ---- THE END! What do you guys think? Feeling: Hopeful